Coming To Netflix Instant – April 2014

It’s a new month, here are some of the new movies you can find on Netflix’s Instant Streaming service:

April 1

Amistad (1997) – Starring Morgan Freeman, Anthony Hopkins and Matthew McConaughey.
Steven Spielberg directed this story about the 1839 revolt aboard Spanish slave ship La Amistad and the uprising’s tragic aftermath.

Amores Perros (2000) – Starring Emilio Echevarria, Gael Garcia Bernal and Goya Toledo.
Octavio has an obsessive crush on his sister-in-law; Daniel dumps his family for a disturbed supermodel; and El Chivo plans an assassination. Amores Perros is a great movie, but it’s hard to sum up in a sentence.

That Splendid November (1969) – Starring Gina Lollobrigida and Gabriele Ferzetti.
The erotic exploits of a large Sicilian family in which the father lectures others about morality and self-control, but nonetheless pursues lovemaking with complete and reckless abandon.

Axed (2012)
A strict dad loosens up and lets his kids take a day off from school for a trip to the countryside. But he intends to make it their last outing ever.

Barton Fink (1991) – Starring John Tutorro and John Goodman.
Barton Fink is one of my favorite Coen brothers movies. Tutorro plays a playwright that suffers from writer’s block while experiencing the horrors of the Hollywood film industry.

The Black Tulip (2010)
When an Afghani family opens a new café where artists and writers express themselves onstage, lingering sects of the Taliban threaten to silence them.

Braveheart (1995) – Starring Mel Gibson.
It’s not historically accurate and it stars known rage-beast Mel Gibson. Got that out of your system? Good. Because Braveheart still owns.

Chinatown (1974) – Starring Jack Nicholson and Faye Dunaway.
One of the finest detective stories ever told. Chinatown is perfect on nearly every level.

Click (2006) – Starring Adam Sandler and Kate Beckinsale.
Adam Sandler plays a guy with a magic remote control he can use to fast-forward, rewind, and pause his life. Know before you press play: it’s more depressing than funny. (It also isn’t very good.)

Comic Book Villains (2002) – Starring Donal Logue.
Comic collector Archie is an innocent bystander caught in the rivalry between two stores that explode over a treasure trove of classic comics.

Commune (2005) –
Through interviews and archival footage, this documentary tells the story of an alternative-living community founded in the California wilderness in 1968.

Coneheads (1993) – Starring Dan Aykroyd and Jane Curtin.
This is one of the better SNL movies. That’s not to say it’s good, but I do still use “narfle the garthok” in my everyday speech.

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000) – Starring Cho Yun-Fat and Michelle Yeoh.
Ang Lee’s articulate direction and Woo-Ping Yuen’s balletic martial arts choreography elevate this story about a young woman in ancient China who longs for an adventurous life rather than a dull arranged marriage.

Spotlight on Death Wish

 

I wish I was dead

I love these next four movies so much that I focused on them for an entire post. Read it here.

Death Wish (1974) – Starring Charles Bronson.
Gentle, liberal architect Paul Kersey seeks revenge against a New York gang that raped his daughter. Featuring special guest appearances by Jeff Goldblum and Denzel Washington.

Death Wish 2 (1982) – Starring Charles Bronson.
Kersey once again rules the night, this time tracking down the men responsible for the murder of his cook and the rape of his daughter.

Death Wish 3 (1985) – Starring Charles Bronson.
Paul Kersey vs. the cast of The Young Ones. When his friend is beaten to death, Kersey is granted special permission by the police to kill street punks at will. I repeat, he is given SPECIAL PERMISSION BY THE POLICE TO KILL STREET PUNKS AT WILL.

Death Wish 4: The Crackdown (1987) – Starring Charles Bronson.
Bronson returns to Los Angeles to take on yet another criminal scourge: crack dealers. It includes the second most hilarious final villain death in the series.

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly (2007) – Starring Mathieu Amalric.
Based on the incredible true story of Elle editor Jean-Dominique Bauby, who lives his life paralyzed after suffering a stroke. Mathieu Amalric stars as author and Elle magazine editor Jean-Dominique Bauby, who suffered a stroke in 1995 that rendered him mute and paralyzed. It is wildly depressing, but excellent.

Dragonslayer (1981) – Starring Peter MacNicol and Caitlin Clarke.
A young wizard is sent to kill a fire-breathing dragon that has been devouring girls from a nearby kingdom.

The English Patient (1996) – Starring Ray Fiennes, Juliette Binoche and Willem Dafoe.
A nurse tends to a badly burned victim who doesn’t remember who he is. Disliked only by Elaine:

The Fifth Element (1997) – Starring Bruce Willis, Milla Jovovich and Gary Oldman.
A futuristic cabbie becomes entangled in a centuries-old plot to save humanity. You can call me “Ruby.”

For a Few Dollars More (1997) – Starring Clint Eastwood, Lee Van Cleef.
Clint Eastwood joins forces with a rival bounty hunter to capture a crazed outlaw in this gritty follow-up to the 1964 classic A Fistful of Dollars. It is magnificent.

Germ Z (2013)
A meteor knocks a satellite to Earth near a small town, infecting military responders and residents with a germ that turns them into cannibals.

The Graduate (1967) – Starring Dustin Hoffman and Anne Bancroft.
A naïve college graduate is seduced by a middle-aged neighbor in this award-winning classic.

The Heart of the Game (2005) – Starring Darnellia Russell, Bill Resler, and Ludacris.
Attending a predominantly white school because of its successful coach, a gifted black hoopster puts herself — and her coach — through the wringer.

The Inbetweeners: Season 3 (2008 – 2010) Starring Simon Bird, James Buckley, and Blake Harrison.
A British comedy about four friends trying to get through their adolescence. I haven’t seen it yet, but it’s supposed to be hysterically funny.

The Inexplicable Universe with Neil deGrasse Tyson (2013)
Are you somehow not getting enough space-talk with Neil deGrasse Tyson? Well then staple this onto your Cosmos experience.

Inventing the Abbotts (1997) – Starring Liv Tyler, Jennifer Connely and Joaquin Phoenix.
In the 1950s, a pair of blue-collar brothers sets out to romance three upper-class sisters, much to the dismay of their tyrannical father.

Jake Blauvelt: Naturally (2013)
In far-flung locations with breathtaking scenery, a talented and stylish snowboarder shows off his killer skills across the globe.

Jumanji (1995) – Starring Robin Williams, Kirsten Dunst, and Bonnie Hunt.
A magical board game unleashes Robin Williams and an ark-load of animals upon an unsuspecting town.

The Lady in Number 6 (2014) – Starring Alice Herz-Sommer.
An original Netflix documentary that tells the story of a Holocaust survivor. Czech pianist and holocaust survivor Alice Herz-Sommer describes how music enabled her to survive one of the darkest chapters in human history.

A League of Their Own (1992) – Starring Tom Hanks, Geena Davis, Madonna, and Lori Petty.
There is no crying in baseball.

Mean Girls (2004) – Starring Lindsay Lohan and Rachel McAdams.
A “normal” high school girl falls in with the popular crowd. Hilarity ensues. Mean Girls is basically the reason we have Tina Fey today. And Lindsay Lohan, I guess… so now I don’t know how to feel.

The Naked Gun 2 1/2: The Smell of Fear (1991) – Starring Leslie Nielsen and Priscilla Presley.
Frank Drebin is out to foil the big boys in the energy industry. It’s almost as perfect as the first Naked Gun film.

No Holds Barred (1989) – Starring Hulk Hogan.
This movie is pure insanity. Featuring bizarre casting, ham-fisted acting and a completely nonsensical plot, No Holds Barred might be the best “pro wrestling” thing ever created. Watch it before you listen to the latest episode of How Did This Get Made?.

The Running Man (1987) – Starring Arnold Schwarzenegger.
One of the finest 80s Arnold action flicks. Nothing like the book, but that’s actually a good thing. The Running Man is classic Schwarzenegger.

Scary Movie 3 (2003) – Starring Charlie Sheen and Anna Faris.
The third Scary Movie. It’s got a decent joke about a character needing a ride home.

Sense and Sensibility
 (1995) – Starring Emma Thompson, Kate Winslet and James Fleet.
Buckle up, it’s time for this story again.

Steel Magnolias (2012) – Starring Queen Latifah.
In this contemporary re-imagining of the beloved classic film, Steel Magnolias chronicles the extraordinary friendship of six remarkable Southern women, there for each other through life’s triumphs and tragedies.

Strangers in Good Company (1990) – Starring Alice Diabo, Constance Garneau and Winifred Holden.
Eight elderly women are left stranded in the wilderness with only their wits, their memories and eventually some roasted frogs’ legs to sustain them.

The Terminator (1984) – Starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton, and Michael Biehn.
An unstoppable killing machine travels back in time to kill–dude, it’s Terminator. It rules. Watch it.

There’s No Business Like Show Business (1954) – Starring Ethel Merman, Marilyn Monroe and Donald O’Connor.
This all-star musical follows The Five Donohues, a vaudeville family whose act is threatened when one of the boys falls for a gorgeous outsider.

This Ain’t California (2012)
This documentary explores the underground skateboarding subculture in the repressive East Germany of the 1970s and ’80s.

Titanic (1997) – Starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet.
The movie that won all the Oscars, follows rich girl Rose and poor boy Jack as they fall in love on the doomed vessel. I own three VHS copies of this movie. Not because I love it, but because for some reason my grocery story would give you one copy of Titanic for every $50 spent during Thanksgiving. ’97 was a weird year.

The Yards (2000) – Starring Mark Wahlberg, Joaquin Phoenix, and Charlize Theron.
Fresh out of prison, Leo tries to get on the right track with help from his shady uncle but once again finds himself on the wrong side of the law.

April 10

Legit (Season 1)  – Starring Jim Jeffries.
Jim Jeffries is a terrific stand-up comic. This show follows his misguided attempts to become “legitimate” in life. I haven’t seen it yet, but I’m looking forward to giving it a shot.

April 24

The Benchwarmers (2006) – Starring David Spade, Jon Heder, and Rob Schneider.
Read that cast list then please join me in drinking a glass of bleach.

Apr 29

Freedomland (2006) – Starring Julianne Moore and Samuel L. Jackson.
The story of an alleged kidnapping of a child by a suspect who is presumed to be black ignites long-simmering racial tension between two neighboring New Jersey towns.

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